A Better Set of Day 1 NCAA Tournament Picks.

My Big East Tournament predictions were a complete disaster, and I hope these selections are at least slightly less horrible.

LSU over Butler
- To hell with mid-majors.

Memphis over Cal State Northridge
- Fun Fact: Cal State Northridge used to be known as San Fernando Valley State College. Another Fun Fact: California State University of Northridge at San Fernando Valley State College is still no good at basketball.

BYU over Texas A&M
- The statement "to hell with mid-majors" does not apply to mormon schools.

Purdue over Northern Iowa
- I prefer Northern Iowa when it is abbreviated as "No. Iowa." As in, nobody needs Iowa, go away.

North Carolina over Radford
- There's nothing rad about driving a Ford.

Cal over Maryland
- When in doubt, don't pick the team that lost to Morgan State this year.

UConn over Chattanooga
- Fun Fact: In a previous life, I covered Chattanooga's point guard, Keyron Sheard. Great dude, great player, but not great enough to beat the Huskies.

Washington over Mississippi State
- Four signs your conference sucks: A team finishes the regular season with a 9-7 mark in your league. They win the conference tournament. They enter postseason play with 23 wins. And they get a 13 seed.

Texas over Minnesota
- Minnesota's court hovers above the first few rows of seats, like a stage. Sounds fun. Now get the fuck out of the tournament.

Michigan over Clemson
- Clemson's epic collapse, Part 346, continues.

Villanova over American
- Villanova hates America. Deport Scottie Reynolds.

Gonzaga over Akron
- Because I'm still upset at Akron for ruining the dream of two SUNY schools in the same NCAA Tournament.

Duke over Binghamton
- Scrappy white players versus problem players who have been featured for their off-court misdeeds. I'll defy all logic by taking the white players.

Oklahoma over Morgan State
- Because Oklahoma is better than Maryland.

UCLA over VCU
- Because when every talking head on ESPN predicts the upset, you know it's not going to happen.

Illinois over Western Kentucky
- See explanation for "UCLA over VCU."