Today I woke up at my usual late morning hour, did my usual morning things, then decided that I would like to see some highlights from last night's basketball games. I was particularly interested to see highlights from Oklahoma-Missouri, because the idiot Sooners ruined my bid for $1 million in Streak for Cash. My streak was up to 10! I was on my way!
So I flip on the TV right around noon. This is perfect, top of the hour, I'll get my highlights pretty quickly. I mean, game between two top 12 teams in the last week of the college basketball regular season, that has to be important right?
Here is a running tally of what I sat through on my quest to watch Missouri ruin my dream.
12:00-12:02
A-Rod has hip troubles. Out till May! Well that's good news.
12:02-12:12
Terrell Owens was released! I mean, that's cool, but does it take ten minutes to share that?
12:12-12:17
Teasing what's coming up after the commercial, then commercial. Okay, fine I'll sit through this and I'll get my highlights.
12:17-12:22
BREAKING NEWS! A-Rod is out until May because of hip surgery! Wait a minute, how is it breaking news at 12:17 if you just reported it at the top of the hour?
12:22-12:25
Whoa! Something else! World Baseball Classic! Japan vs. China!
12:25-12:26
Terrell Owens gets mentioned quickly. Did you not just spent ten minutes talking about him earlier?
12:26-12:30
Tease/commercials. Live Manny News Conference after the break, great.
12:30-12:51
Discuss Manny. Manny news conference. Okay fine, the upside to live Sportscenter all day, you can take things like this live. I assume since the hour will be almost over after this, we'll get those highlights I was looking for. Or any highlights for that matter, as far as I know there were a lot of college and pro basketball games last night.
12:51-12:55
Tease/commercials. Gah.
12:55-1:00
More Terrell Owens! How many ways can you say "The Cowboys released Terrell Owens?"
1:00
Top of the hour! New Sportscenter time! At this point I don't care what highlights I get, I just want proof that sporting events occurred last night.
1:00-1:01
BREAKING NEWS! A-Rod out until May! I've always wondered: how long does a story have to be around before it's not breaking news any more? You would think that once the story has initially been "broken," it is no longer breaking news. It is now just current news, that your report as such. Oh well.
1:01-1:12
DEVELOPING STORY! Terrell Owens released! Another thing I don't understand. How is this story developing? Once he is released, that's it, that's the story. Owens' release was first reported at midnight last night. He has been released for well over 12 hours now. The story is no longer developing. It is a discussion point, but there is no more development.
1:12-1:16
Tease/commercials. This is getting predictable.
1:16-1:21
Breaking News. A-Rod. Come on.
1:21-1:24
WBC - Japan v. China. Who the hell cares?
1:24-1:27
More T.O. talk. Yawn.
1:27-1:30
Tease/commercials. I wish there was something else on TV so I didn't spend the last hour and a half watching Sportscenter.
1:30-1:34
Basketball highlights! Finally! Oklahoma-Missouri! Wow, Blake Griffin sucks. Kansas-Texas Tech! Chris McKendry just told me Kansas only hit 1 three pointer. That's interesting considering the box score on the website for the company she happens to work for says they hit 4 of them. Whatever.
1:34-1:35
Quick recap of "Sportscenter Right Now." You guessed it, we were reminded about A-Rod and T.O.
1:35-1:41
More Terrell Owens talk. Great. I'm done tracking this.
So for those of you keeping score at home, in one hour and 41 minutes of Sportscenter, this is the break down:
36 minutes on T.O.
21 minutes on Manny News Conference
20 minutes on commercials
13 minutes on A-Rod
6 minutes on World Baseball Classic
4 minutes on two Big 12 games
1 minute reminding us that A-Rod and T.O. are the two top stories
0 minutes on 6 other games that involved 7 total ranked teams
0 minutes on 10 NBA games
Wow. Nice work, Worldwide Leader.
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